Post by Jennah Raine Advani on Dec 30, 2010 19:35:12 GMT -7
They'd walked back home. They had walked and it hurt Jennah with every single step she took. The pain in her womb was spreading to other parts of her body...at least, it felt like it was. Perhaps that pain was simply because she had fallen down the stairs to the RSOR room and that is quite a tumble. Other parts of her body surely had to be sore. It just wasn't until now that she noticed. And though her body ached, her stomach stood out. The other pains were a dull burning pain, but her stomach? It felt like someone was ripping her open with a dull knife.
She did not have a good feeling about this at all. On the entire walk home, Jennah was silently worrying for Jasmine. She wasn't kicking or moving or...anything and it was severely worrying the young mother. If Jennah felt all this pain, she wondered if Jasmine did was well. If Jasmine could feel it, that must be bad. If Jasmine could feel it, Jennah feared she would lose the daughter she carried inside of her. She'd been carrying Iskander's baby for a while...she was more than halfway through...
Jasmine had to be strong. Look at her parents, after all - a Chinese female warrior who lead armies against the Qing regime and a sultan who had taken Jerusalem from English crusaders. It was in her blood to be a strong little girl. She definitely kicked hard enough, in Jennah's opinion. That is, when she did kick...which wasn't right now...
And Jasmine's father had said a prayer. Jennah watched him. He prayed. Allah would protect their daughter, wouldn't he?
...Wouldn't he?
Despite all this, Jennah knew she needed to see a doctor. She knew a doctor would help her more than an unseen God (she kept that from her zealot boyfriend). But Iskander could not afford the taxi and Jennah had no money on her. There was no way they could just walk to the doctors. All they had right now was faith...and that worried Jennah. It worried her quite a bit.
When they finally did reach Iskander's home, the best thing they could think of for her to do would be trying to sleep. Perhaps she could sleep off the pain and when she woke, Jasmine would be all right. Jennah would be all right. Everything would be perfect and normal and Jennah and Iskander would still be parents. So, carefully, Jennah took off her sweater dress, black ugg boots, hair feather and leggings and put on her pajamas and carefully laid down on her cot in Iskander's living room which had been serving as her bed ever since the school kicked her out of the dorms for being with child. She drank the tea Iskander made for her, but it did nothing to calm her. She closed her eyes, trying to ignore the pain and sleep…
…But Jennah had no such luck. Her throbbing tummy was keeping her up. She frowned and hugged her pillow, biting down on her bottom lip. She lay like that for quite some time before she heard the footfalls of her favorite white dog. Lump came up to her and sat, her big black eyes looking into Jennah’s brown ones. Jennah gave the dog a small, pained smile and scratched her behind the ears. Lump leaned into Jennah’s touch before pressing her wet nose against Jasmine gently. Then, she licked Jennah’s feet – making the girl giggle a bit – and slipped under the cot…where she barely fit. Jennah sighed and waited for the dog to get comfortable. When she finally did, Jennah almost felt relaxed. Lump was under the cot, like normal. Jasmine was heavy on her, like normal. She was alone, like normal. And like normal, Jennah drifted off to sleep and began to dream.
Jennah lay in the soft green grass of an open field. She opened her eyes to sunshine and blue skies. She smiled at the warmth of the sun on her skin. She wondered if Jasmine could feel that it was a nice day. Jennah moved her hand to lie on her belly…but she only felt her flat abdomen. She shot up, her eyes widening when she felt no baby in her stomach. She heard her heart pounding in her ears — where was her baby? Where was Jasmine? And then her eyes fell on a little girl, sitting in the grass picking white flowers not too far from her. Jennah’s expression softened when she looked at the child. The child had long, black hair and shining brown eyes. Her skin was gently tanned and her limbs were still short and pudgy since she was young. She had a familiar aloof expression on her face as she picked the flowers. Jennah had seen that expression, but on a boy. A boy she loved very much. This little girl had traits of this boy, yet at the same time, Jennah saw herself in the girl. It couldn’t be…
“Jasmine?” Jennah called to the girl cautiously. The little girl looked up from her flower picking and a smile crossed her features, lighting them up much like Iskander’s smile does for his own features.
Jasmine ran to her mother and threw her arms around her neck. Jennah smiled and held her daughter close to her chest, kissing her soft, tanned cheek. “Jasmine,” She said softly and lovingly.
“Mommy,” Jasmine smiled and leaned away a bit, giving Jennah the white flowers she had picked. Jennah smiled and took the flowers from her, inhaling their sweet scent.
“Thank you, baby,” Jennah said to her daughter before tucking a small white flower into Jasmine’s soft, smooth, black hair. Jasmine smiled and, copying her mother, she took a white flower and tucked it into her mommy’s hair. Jasmine’s hand slid from Jennah’s hair to Jennah’s cheek. Her little smile faded and she whimpered, “Mommy, why didn’t you save me?”
Jennah’s smile also fell and her brow furrowed. “What’re you talking about, Jasmine?” She asked. She didn’t like Jasmine’s tone and the expression on her face. It was worrying her.
“Why didn’t you save me?” Jasmine asked again, “Why did you and Daddy let me die?”
Instantly, Jennah held Jasmine protectively, bringing her close to her chest. “Jasmine,” She said soothingly…or as soothingly as she could since her daughter’s words were really bothering her, “What are you talking about? Your father and I love you very, very much. We would never let anything bad happen to you.” She pulled away slightly and stroked her daughter’s cheek with her thumb, “What’s all this about death? You’re alright.”
But Jasmine shook her head no. She placed her small hand over her mother’s and said, “You walked home instead of going to the doctor, Mommy. You and Daddy walked home…you could have saved me…”
Jennah tilted her head to the side, a look a fear beginning to cross her features; “Jasmine…Jasmine don’t talk like that-“
Jasmine shook her head again and looked down and said softly, “You let me die, Mommy…but…I know you didn’t mean to.” Jennah looked into the matching pair of dark eyes when Jasmine looked up again, “I still love you, Mommy.” And the little girl hugged Jennah.
Jennah hugged her back tightly. “I love you too, baby girl…” But what was this about death??
“Tell Daddy I love him too,” Jasmine sniffled, “Okay?”
“Okay.”
Jennah heard a twig snap behind her. She gasped and held Jasmine closer to her as she scrambled to her feet and spun around, the flower falling from her hair. Jasmine whimpered in fear at what they saw and buried her face into her Mommy’s chest while Jennah’s eyes widened at the sight. Before her was a large black raven with glowing blue eyes and large, sharp talons. Her eyes widened and motherly instinct took over. She placed Jasmine on the ground and gave her light shove in the opposite direction of the raven. “Run, Jasmine!” She cried, turning back to the demonic bird. Jasmine scurried away but ended up turning around, watching in horror as Mommy turned back to the bird, unarmed.
Jennah glared at the bird, unafraid. As long as Jasmine got away, she didn’t care what the outcome of this was. The bird lashed out, it’s mighty talons aiming for Jennah’s face. But she was faster and she caught both talons in her hands. The great bird struggled with her, beating it’s great black wings at the air, trying to fly and get away. Jennah dug her heels into the ground so she would not be dragged along. Her eyes were narrowed, as were the bird’s. Her arms twisted with the bird’s struggle, but she did not let go.
“Jennah,” A voice called to her. Jennah turned her head towards the voice. Standing there with Jasmine in his arms was Iskander. He looked so sad, but Jennah didn’t know why.
Jasmine looked at her mother with the exact same sad look and said, “It’s over, Mommy.” And then she snuggled closer to her father’s chest.
Before Jennah could react, she felt the talon slip from her strong grasp. She looked back at the bird right as it’s talon slashed over her abdomen. Her breath left her as her eyes widened. She looked down at her wound; three deep scratches slashed her, the top one being just below her breasts and the lowest just under her belly button. She watched the blood flow thick, red and warm from her wounds. It dripped down her stomach and Jennah could feel it’s wet warmth on her legs. She could taste it in her mouth and she felt it drip from her lips. Her knees buckled and Jennah sank to the ground, falling onto her back and staring up at the sky. It was no longer bright and sunny. Thick gray clouds had come with the raven and conquered the sky. It wasn’t warm anymore. A cold wind blew over her. Jennah weakly turned her head towards where she’d last seen Jasmine. “Run, Jasmine,” She rasped, “Run.”
But instead, she saw Iskander staring into the eyes of the bird. He looked down at Jasmine for a moment and he frowned, looking completely torn. He looked back at the bird, defeated, and reluctantly offered Jasmine to the raven. With her last bit of strength, Jennah screamed as the raven reached its talon out and wrapped it around her daughter—
Jennah’s eyes snapped open. There was sweat on her brow and she was panting. She looked around. It was dark…and she was on her cot in her corner of Iskander’s living room. She sighed and felt a wet, warm tongue slide over her face. Jennah wrinkled her nose and was able to make out Lump sitting in front of her. Her eyes had yet to adjust to the darkness and she’d fallen asleep with her contacts in again, so her eyes were dry. She blinked a few times before she finally saw the white dog. Lump sat before her, whimpering and licking Jennah’s hands and face. Jennah raised a questioning eyebrow. “Lump, stop,” She said, gently pushing the dog away. Still, Lump came back to Jennah and she returned whimpering.
“What is it, girl?” Jennah asked as she slowly sat up. When she moved, she felt her pajama pants stick to her leg. They were warm and wet. Jennah’s breath caught in her throat and she froze. She could smell something iron-y in the air…she knew that smell well from days of old in the battlefield. The smell of blood. Maybe she was dreaming. Yes. She had to be dreaming. She forced her eyes closed…but when she opened them, the smell and warmth was still there.
Her body was shaking now and Jennah hesitantly moved her hand between her legs. She touched the inside of her upper thigh, running her fingers along the warmth before she slowly brought her hand to her face. Even in the limited light, she could see the dark red staining her fingers.
And then Jennah screamed. Her scream was somewhere between a shriek of horror and a wail of a mother’s sorrow. Her cry was loud and it pierced the silence of the night. No doubt the neighbors heard it. Lump’s ears pressed against her head at the sound, she knew something wasn’t right. She turned and ran, barking for her master to come to his “mate” and help her. Jennah remained on her cot, unmoving other than to tear back the sheets and stare at the blood that covered her lower half. She felt another stabbing pain in her abdomen again. Jennah clutched her stomach, but only as a reaction to the pain. There was no longer a baby for her to protect.
WORD COUNT: 2130
LISTENING TO: you are your daddy's son - ragtime & hello by evanescence
COMMENTS: outfit 1 outfit 2
can you tell i spent a lot of time thinking about this?[/font]